So far no news is good news but at the same time I am thinking no news also means I did not get it as I do not see the E! team replying back to all the applicants (I can imagine it ran to the hundreds). Ugh! Most of the time when I participate in something I rarely want it very much. I think it’s a self defence mechanism to prevent myself from feeling disappointed and hurt if I did not get it. Thinking back I think it was wrong of me to do that . The cons of stopping myself from getting excited and hopeful is th at one does not get excited for anything. Nothing. Everything is blasé, a ‘so what ’ event, I made my life so boring. Nothing to look forward to…
Bleh~ done and over with
So anyhoo, yeah! I really want this! Not sure I will get it but definitely something to stay up awake for. I am waiting anxiously and thinking wh at I could have done better, should I have lied in my cv and spruced up my experiences. Should I have digitalized myself to look thin and beautiful? Believe it or not this sort of thing actually went through my head for the past few days driving myself nuts. Will they call? Will they not call?
I read from other blogs (which has been pure torture for me to read) that quite a few local celebrities in Malaysia have applied for the role. No! I should stop doing this to myself. I can do this! HA! HA! HA! Ha ha ha ha ha….choke*
Is this a panic attack?
Weekend was spent vegetating but good news to share! We have new renters moving in this week. After I warned them how noisy we can get, how noisy the dogs are they (a nice couple from Nelson) were still very interested. All good in da hood! Nice! So that ’s extra income there and all I need to do now is get a second job (this is another one I have to gird my loins for) for a few months and away I go. I am so excited! I do feel bad for leaving MOH in the lurch but my soul needs this. Selfish! I know…sigh… what can I do? My head says be mature and responsible, settle down and start putting roots into the country. But my heart and soul want to give this a chance while my breasts is still perky and my hair is still long and bountiful.
*Imagine me one foot on the chair and the other on the table with my arm outstretched pointing to the horizon. A true image of a fighter.
Actually, let me do something even better and show you a photo of the said image.
This gentle readers is my fighting stance.