Let me tell you a funny story that happened to me when I was 20 years old. So, I was back in Malaysia for the summer holidays. At that time I was in my second year of University and manage to score a free flight from the parental units. We stop by KL as my dad had some business there and on the second night in KL we were told that we were invited to a dinner with dads numero uno man, the big kahuna, the big boss, the boss of all bosses… sorry, I got carried away. *cough
Jadi, we went to dinner at this super posh place and I wore a sun dress which fit me like a glove when I was 18 but I had gained weight when I was in Auckland and was roughly about 5kg heavier and it did not look good in that dress. I think the perfect description would be that I look like a stuffed turkey. When my father saw what I wore all he did was shake his head and smirked! This is my parent ok! The love of my life, smirking, thanks for the vote of confidence dad! So we went to dinner at this posh place and instead of walls the VIP area was enclosed in wall to wall wine racks filled with expensive wine. I think, if I remember correctly it was about half a million dollars worth of wine in that one room. I was gob smacked! Super jakun.
We sat down for dinner and for all I know the food could have been wonderful but to me everything tasted like saw dust. I hadn’t realise it was to be such a formal dinner and there I was dressed like a stuffed turkey. Worse! It was an impromptu matchmaking dinner. I kid you not. The parents wanted to see how both me and the boss son would gel (not forgetting that both of us were seeing other people at that time). The big boss was lamenting that his sons’ current girlfriend was a five foot nothing (so mean, I tell you, as if height was an indication of intelligence or any positive attributes a person would have).
I found myself in an awkward situation but the son was very nice, cordial and polite with a very adorable upper crust British accent. He had the exclusive English boarding school boy aura exuding from his very pores. I wish I could say that I was equally as polished and eloquent that night but it would be a lie. I spilled wine on my 2 sizes too small dress, mumbled when spoken to and just had a very strong urge to get up and run away as fast as my Kadazan given calves could bring me.
The funny part was that the one time I manage to make intelligent conversation something terribly mortifying happened.
I said “Oh yes, well the world economy right now is doing quite well but I have read that it won’t be for very long, looking at the world expenditure….” I break off as I hear a tiny plop, I look down in horror to see my dress strap in the soupy dessert that I was forcing myself to eat.
Wonderful, just freaking ‘how could this happen to me right now can anything else go wrong???’ type of wonderful. The only blessing was that no one noticed and the son just politely looked away as I scooped my strap and cleaned up the mess. Thank God it was dessert and we were almost done. The minutes ticked by unbearably slow. If I had any questions on how purgatory would be like all was revealed that night while I waited for dinner to finish.
Years later, here I am in my office working away when I suddenly remembered that night, it was horrifying at that time but now it is just too funny